Denver. For a long time it seemed like both the city and the basketball team of Denver had made their way back to being a normal OBWL town and franchise. It was nothing but an illusion. It was nothing than hopes that crashed today. After long period of silence and absence Demons GM Klaus von Meyerinck made it painfully clear today that he is back – and unchanged. In his first press confernece in what must have been over a year he introduced his new so called “strategy” to finally bring a title to Denver. The name of his program: Meyerinck Awakens Denver Making Adversarys Naked.
Or in abbriviations: MADMAN.
There you go. Gone seem the days when the Demons played very quietly and mildly successfully, making it to the playoffs last season, gaining a much wanted reputation as a very normal franchise, building a team with at least something of a future, steering through a season without half a dozen players coming or going, without scandal and outrage and without anyone being humiliated by an obviously crazy GM.
All that happening under the reigns of the first OWBL man turned to woman coach, Emanuelle Rasmussen, formerly known as Emanuel Rasmussen. All that while KvM went awol. And no one asked where he went or why. Since no one missed him.
Everything changed today. Headcoach Rasmussen is gone, she almost fled town, and with her left the entire staff out of sympathy and solidarity and of course out of fear. Because rumors of KvM’s imminent return had been floating around. Sole exception was Denver’s scout Kevin “Blind eye” Parker, 53, who worked as an optician in Denver and got the job offered by KvM when the bought his first pair of glasses at Parker’s. Basketball experience: none. Of course not. But Parker has a reputation of being firmly anti woke, so that probably got him the job and that of course led to a more than strained relationship with Ms. Rasmussen.
So KvM today stepped on the podium in what was one of the shortest press conferences in Denver’s history and we can surely afford to quote his entire statement:
“What you’re looking at, slime bags?! I’m back. Don’t ask where I have been, I won’t tell you anyway. Ok, Italy. Best damned country in the world! And that food. And the girls. I’m bigger, better, and fatter than ever. I’m hungry for pasta and a ring. So that terrible coach is gone, we will start over and I developed a new strategy to bring the title to Denver. Called it Meyerinck awakens Denver making adversarys naked. More when our new head coach is in, I did find the best guy ever. Wait and see. That’s it. Get out.”
Well, KvM’s strategy abbreviates to MADMAN, as nearly all journalists found out very quickly with a grim smile on their faces.
And that is what Denver has to deal with. Again.
Oh, and about that ring? How’s that supposed to happen with a roster full of gaping holes and an already worn out guard in Hobert Shell who makes all star money eating up way too much cap space and is nothing but a former top draft pick fallen very quickly and very deep? The Demons, that’s for sure, do not have the means to come even close to a contending roster.
Since we know that KvM won’t deliver any meaningful answer to that, maybe the new HC will tell us more.
Whoever will be MAD enough to work with a crazy MAN at the helm…
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